Why did things turn out this way? I thought we can be friends, when one party want more than that everything changes..He become very weird..I know he isnt feeling any better than mine but why? I don't think that i am so attractive that you can fall for me in a short period of time but i really just want to make friend..What wrong of being friend even though i think i have just give a wrong first impression of me to you..I swear i am guilty of that too..i really do and i really feel very sorry towards you..I guess i am isn't worthy for you to treat me so good yet nothing good benefits you in the end..But i really appreciate what u did this morning, thank you so much! I really hope that we can stay as friend at least for now..
Back to myself, i have realized that i isn't confidence enough to get in relationship that explain why dint i accept him even though i have a little feeling for him..Maybe before i met him, i have already let go of ky but still wants to linger and did not realize that i no longer love him..Yet i still wish to know is happening in his life, wants to make back friends with him.Therefore,i thought i still have feeling for him.. But i don't anymore. I seems to have safety barriers on guys when they claim that they are falling for me..I will get really scare and nervous, worried that i might get hurt once again..Even when i have feeling for them, i will force myself not to accept the relationship..I will start to think wild and words that come out are really hurtful and communication will get screw..Sorry! I won't get a boyfriend till i find the rightful one..
May god bless him(s).
Let me bear the punishment myself.